February 28, 2007


yesterday i ate a big old turkey hoagie. the turkey, i rationalized, is a particularly stupid bird that does not deserve the humanity that should be granted to other, more significant, creatures. i also feel the same way about stupid humans.

to be honest, the hoagie (or "hey tony, lemme get a turkey hero to go. hold the mayo") wasn't as great as anticipated. and that's exactly what i deserve for 1. eating an animal and 2. eating a particularly stupid animal.

however, considering it's been years since i've ingested an animal, the guilt i felt was surprisingly minimal - this partly in due to my "stupid" realization. and i may have also been distracted by the level of uneasiness i rendered upon my stomach for the rest of the day.

now, you're probably wondering what brought me to this ginormous step towards a new lifestyle and the answer, my friends, is simple: hot wings

in recent weeks, i've been overcome by an insane desire for hot wings. preferably served with beer.

though the reason is unclear as to why this craving has stricken me, i am more than welcome to suggestions. but the fact of the matter remains, I NEED HOT WINGS!

and i intend to eat them. this weekend. on a romantic date with ben. surrounded by big-breasted women wearing orange short shorts. and beer.

i ask anyone who has made this plant-eater/meat-eater transition to give me tips on how to make the transition both graceful and successful.


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