December 20, 2007

Zoey is a slut

i know you've all be at the edge of your seats hoping and wishing and praying that Nickelodeon would soon make a statement regarding their show ZOEY 101, staring Jamie Lynn Spears.

WELL $Ries clued me in on this article from the AP (Associated Press, dummies) and though there's no news regarding Zoey 101, the network has stated that they are considering turning this travesty into a "special" about sex and love. gag me. as if that isn't bad enough, they are calling in old Nick News journalist Linda Ellerbee.

The one thing i distinctly remember of Linda Ellerbee on Nickelodeon was the SNOOOOOZE FEST. and the power lesbian haircut. apparently this bitch has been married 3 times too. then she gave up penis in the 70s. practically a century before JL Spears was even born.

anyhow, in related "news" it seems that Ashlee Simpson is bitching and moaning about how JL Spears stole the spotlight from her yesterday when Ashlee released her new video for the painfully infectious song "Outta My Head (Ay Ya Ya)".

a. the video pretty much blows
b. Spears women will out do Simpson women any day of the week. that crazy Jessica was an honest to god virgin on her wedding day. fucking weirdo.


December 19, 2007

do not

i repeat, DO NOT fuck with a tall black man. he will beat yo ass. and rightfully so.


my new favorite canine

panda dog!


December 18, 2007

babies having babies!!

okay maybe lily allen isn't that young but she's younger than me and i wouldn't dream of getting knocked up!

so yeah, 22-year old lily allen and SIXTEEN YEAR OLD jamie lynn spears are expecting. not together though. lily's man is one of the old guys from The Chemical Brothers and jamie lynn's live-in boyfriend is some 19 year old douche.

so proud of that jamie lynn!! it always annoyed the shit out me that her namesake is a combo of her mother and father's names: Jamie Spears (dad) and Lynn Spears (mama dukes). seriously? how narcissistic. but she went and showed them a thing or two. she's all "britney britney britney. nobody cares about jamie lynn...i'll show those fuckers"

yes you did, jamie lynn. yes. you. did.

i don't think this guy above is JLS's actual baby daddy but he looks like a douche regardless so it works for me.


December 16, 2007


deja vu, much? i seem to remember this exact same clip some months back but it was carrie underwood perched up there and not bimbo simpson.

carrie also had sweet box seats. poor jessica is just chilling here with the mortals. then again, 2007 didn't do much for her. she's practically D-listed.

dear jessica,

borrow your sister's plastic surgeon and give us something grand in 2008.




Harnishpalooza 2007

wow the holiday party season is taking its toll on me but i'd have to say, this year's Harnishpalooza turned out pretty well. we had a good little crowd of people show and bill and frank in particular were extra festive this year.


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