May 1, 2009

hippy goat

from the makers of Emo Cow, i bring you HIPPY GOAT!

(shout out to Jordan for the tip-off!)

not to be confused with Happy Goat but still kind of freaking awesome.


April 30, 2009

keepin' it topical

it's funny until i actually get the swine flu - because there's no way i can avoid trains. DAMN YOU, Joe Biden.

whatever, i ain't afraid of a little flu. i eat pigs of BREAKFAST. speaking of pigs....

part sheep, part pig = SHEEPPIG!

and thanks to Michelle's Photoshop Paint skillz we've also got SEXY SHEEPPIG!


Cuchini: The Camel Toe Eraser

this post goes out to my coworker, Ms. Elizabeth Gopaul who i affectionately refer to as Camel Toe. not because i've ever seen her with one but because her beautiful luscious eyelashes are long like a camel. and i have a hard time saying "camel" without following it up with "toe". either way, i don't explain this story when i yell "heyyy camel toe!" to her around the office. she just gets some funny stares before she huffs and puffs and squeaks and calls me "hoe cake" and runs off to her office. ahhhh my little camel toe.

Summer’s almost here, ladies! Are you ready? And more importantly, is your vagina ready? If it’s not, you better get your hands on the Cuchini - a brand new pad that “eliminates camel toe.”

(Yes, this is a real product with a real website. Thankfully, the entire site is written in the nasty Comic Sans font for added comedic effect. )

The CUCHINI? Couldn’t they come up with a better name? It sounds like a really bad lesbian magician’s stage name… or something a lonely old bearded man would pay to get in the back seat of his car (”come on baby, how much for THE CUCHINI?”)

Anyway, here’s the thing: of course it eliminates camel toe! You’re shoving a BICYCLE SEAT down your underwear. Look at the size of that thing! Forget a camel toe. The Cuchini could easily hide your eccentric neighbor’s Mini Cooper.


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